Does size matter: penis pumps and toxic masculinity

Today I depart from my usual blogging schedule to bring you a sponsored post. It’s a little outside my comfort zone, but the more I thought about the idea the more I decided I wanted to write something – to process my thoughts at least, and definitely to invite others to share their thoughts.

Does size matter? In my opinion, if you’re talking about penis size, then no. I don’t care how big your dick is, or whether or not it’s a bio cock or blue and sparkly. In fact, the smell often matters to me more than the size: I’m a perv, and I find burying my face into someone’s crotch to breathe in their lovely intimate scent extremely hot.

However, there’s a second question that we need to ask as well, when we talk about penis size: do we live in a society that puts pressure on all of us to look a certain way? Absolutely. Does that pressure extend to the size of your penis? Yes, it probably does.

It’s maybe not the body positivity issue that needs to be top of our list right now, but it’s one worth talking about. Porn isn’t a bad thing – with the caveats that it shouldn’t be the used as sex education and that you should pay for your porn – but I am fairly certain that mainstream porn, in particular, we are shown a skewed view of reality that implies larger-than-average penises are the norm.

They’re not: larger-than-average size penises are exactly that – larger-than-average. We need to work towards a society where folks who have penises don’t have to worry that their dicks are too small, because everyone’s body is valid just as it is. However, we don’t live in that perfect world where no one gets made fun of for their body. I wish we lived in that world, but we don’t.

This means, surely, that it’s important for people to be able to do things that make them feel better about themselves, right? While no one needs to change how they look, they are allowed to use tricks to make themselves feel more confident so they can enjoy the sex they’re having.

So while I had never thought about penis pumps being empowering, I am beginning to think there is a case that could be made.

I have a friend who takes anti-depressants, and their side effects mean that sometimes he uses a cock ring to help him maintain an erection. Not because his partner requires him to do so, but because he prefers to stay hard while they’re fucking.

Even though I admit that I’m not sure about all the science behind a penis pump, I can imagine that it would help folks who are struggling with their body confidence or functionality in some way. Folks with erectile dysfunction could use body safe toys to get hard or stay hard for longer. Or even people who have gender dysphoria who could use penis or clitoris pumps to help their bodies align further with their gender identity.

Though if folks are using these technologies, we need to make sure that we’re all working to dismantle the stigma that makes them feel that they have to do so

Alternatively, an idea for a BDSM scene has been forming in my mind. It involves a squirming submissive, a pair of latex gloves, a penis pump and a lot of begging. I think it has potential, playing with the idea of torturing a restrained (and consenting) sub with continuing to stimulate their cock after they have come.


This post was kindly sponsored by the creators of the Hollywood Hustler Penis Pumps collection. As ever, all opinions are my own.

A sonnet to my sex blog
Filling unspecified fuck holes


  1. I’m too old to worry about penis size, if I’ve learned one thing over the years is it ain’t going to change. You have what you have so be happy and have fun with it. I bought a basic penis pump years ago out of curiosity. I rarely use it, but when I do it’s to enjoy the intense feeling of pressure on my cock. It’s also fun to watch it expand as I squeeze the bulb. When you release the pressure your cock goes back down to size, so it’s not like you are going to pump it up and turn into this fucking machine. Just a fun toy. It might be fun to try one of the ones that masturbates you.

    I did check out the Hollywood Hustler site, and thank you for that, I’d not heard of them. I found some things I’m going to buy, hard to pass up a new cock ring. And who knows, I saw a penis pump that looked interesting. If I get it, I’ll give you a report.

    1. p.s. I like your story idea. I saw a clip of a guy tied down having an electric toothbrush run up and down his cock. That I would like.

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