I was thrilled to find a second BDSM-meets-Bake-Off erotica entry in my inbox earlier today. Inez Sinclair (Incognita) is a freelance NSFW voice actress and storyteller with a background in technical writing and cultural folklore. She’s recently directed her creativity to erotica, as an outlet for her fantasies and as a way to continue advocating for unique stories and dynamics in sexual settings. Find her on Twitter at @IncognitaVa, where you can let her know if her words left you with – ahem – stiff peaks.
Content note for choking (the ‘do not try this at home’ kind) and a rose-gold monster dong.
Golden threads of caramel formed a spiral shape around the sleek, dark chocolate platform of a checkerboard-patterned cake, while airy puffs of colourful choux pastries– coated in sprinkles and glazes made from natural dyes– floated in the webs of caramel. Around them, silhouettes of children, sculpted from tempered chocolate, were made to look as though they were bouncing the cream puffs.
Hidden by folded arms, Elina gripped the corners of her blouse with her hands, forcing her face to conceal the sinking feeling of defeat with a calm exterior.
“A wrinkled blouse won’t make a good impression on national television,” murmured a low, monotone voice to her right.
“Buzz off,” Elina hissed, her brows tensing for a millisecond before she returned to her stoic facade.
She glanced at her own creation beside the da Vincian work of her rival: She had made a dacquoise with pearlescent, pastel orbs of pre-baked raspberry meringues embedded in the
layers of additional hazelnut meringue and mocha buttercream on a salted caramel biscuit base. Yet as delicate and refined as her cake turned out, the flavour had been too decadent for the judges, and the consistency of her meringue was “slightly off.” Now it was a matter of one tiny miscalculation from the one worthwhile rival in all of this, the same person who had stoked the embers of her highly competitive nature:
“Vera Herney, you are this year’s winner of ‘Bake It Till You Make It!’ Congratulations, you have won…”
Elina tuned out the host’s voice and the collective golf-clapping and lauds from other bakers and judges, focusing more on her fate beyond Vera’s victory.
‘If you lose, you’re coming home with me.’
“You didn’t even need the prize money, did you?”
Elina grimaced at the luminous city landscape through the ceiling-to-floor windows of Vera’s flat.
“I’ve been fortunate to pick up jobs that pay me well,” shrugged the tall, monotone woman with sleek, ass-length hair in a braid. She carried two wine glasses that contained liquid-filled gel orbs towards her well-dressed guest in the silk blouse and pencil skirt.
“The luxury of being born rich,” Elina snorted, still bitter from losing. “It’s nice to have friends in high places, isn’t it? Leaving the rest of us to fend for ourselves.”
“That’s the fuel of your aggression towards me? After all these years?” Vera retorted, half-enthused. She set the two glasses down on a coffee table nestled between a sofa and a couch.
Elina remained by the window, leaning against it for support.
“What, the fact that your family name alone can get you into the most prestigious schools? Or that you can just up and leave law school and go gallivanting into culinary school without batting an eye because you feel like it while the rest of us had to work our lives off trying to make it through and pay rent? Noooo, whatever makes you think that, Miss Hern–,”
Elina halted her rant when she turned to look at her silent hostess, paralysed by Vera’s intense and unreadable gaze. An overwhelming feeling of dread came over the shorter brunette, as Vera advanced slowly to her.
“Do you mean that, Elina? You only found a rival in me because you wanted to become some rags-to-riches heroine in your own life story? To prove that someone who came from nothing could be better than a person born into a wealthy dynasty of liars and squanderers?”
“And every time you fell short of excellence, did you reason it with ‘She’s richer, of course she’s going to succeed!’ or ‘No wonder she got this job, her family had connections!’ to justify your own failures and shortcomings?”
“That’s not what I–,”
“Everywhere I went, everything I did, you were there like a shadow. Was it just to satiate your need for validation and success in your life of adversity? Is that all I am to you? A loathsome motivation for you to overco–,”
“I wanted you to notice me!” Elina blurted, tears bubbling up from the wells of her eyes. “You were always so radiant, even when we were kids. Everyone flocked to you because you were pretty and kind and smart and mature – I didn’t have a star’s chance of catching your eye unless I could match up to you. So I worked my ass off; made myself believe that you’d never consider me your equal unless I could beat you. Justified it to everyone else so that they’d be on my side, know my fight.”
“You’re an idiot.”
“Yeah, no shit!” Elina kept swatting at her eyes with the back of her hands to wipe off tears that couldn’t seem to stop.
“I can’t even light a fucking candle to you! You’re like a magician when it comes to baking and cooking! That fucking cake for the finale? Like, what the hell was that?”
“I wanted to win,” Vera responded matter-of-factly.
“So I’d come home with you?”
“Only if you wanted.”
“Why the fuck would you want that?”
“Because I’m in love with you, Elina.”
“You’re in–wait, what?”
The tall, raven-haired woman gave an exasperated laugh, leaning against the window across from Elina.
“Is it that hard to believe?”
“Saying ‘yes’ would be an understatement,” Elina scoffed, hesitating to say anything else
because of the sudden blankness forming in her mind. The embers of a thought began to ignite a long-dormant fantasy in Elina’s head. She eyed the woman clad in black sweatpants and matching hoodie up and down with playful scepticism. “For starters, you are horrendously under-dressed for a date.”
“I like to be comforta–this is a date?”
“We both like each other, don’t we? Why else would I be obsessed with you for over twenty years?”
“That’s…a fair point. But I don’t want you rushing into anything you don’t feel ready for yet.”
The city lights illumined Elina’s skin in varying hues as she unbuttoned her blouse and wiggled her pencil skirt off before the long-haired woman, whose mouth subsequently gaped at the sight.
“I’m ready for it. But I’m not going to be on the bottom in this situation just because I’m shorter than you,” Elina smirked, closing the gap between the two of them, still choosing to lean on the window. She placed a hand on the side of her rival’s neck, gradually pulling the tall woman down to her level.
“Are you okay with that, Vera?”
The two women’s lips hovered centimetres away from one another as Elina waited for Vera to answer.
“I’m perfectly fine with that, though we haven’t addressed your inferiority complex yet,” Vera mused, tilting her head down to finally kiss the radically shorter woman.
During their lip-locking, Elina grazed her other hand along the waistband of Vera’s pants; she began to tug the article down, but felt it catch on something sizeable. Elina’s eyes widened at the girthy, ribbed, rose gold dildo strapped to her partner’s body, and stifled an excited giggle as they pulled away from each other.
“We haven’t addressed your monster dong, either, and I’d rather start with that first, to be frank.”
Elina knelt to meet the phallic item face-to-face, glancing up out of curiosity to find Vera flustered and stunned speechless. With a smile, she took the cock into her mouth, sucking it from base to tip with occasional flicks of the tongue to show off. As much as she enjoyed the novelty of the toy though, her fingers snuck behind the strap-on to feel her partner’s warmth. The move elicited a surprised moan from the taller woman, whose normally stoic façade crumbled into a fluster now.
“H-have you always been like this?”
“Like what?” Elina pushed two of her fingers further into her trembling, blushing partner. Vera’s body wrapped itself tightly around Elina’s fingers, conforming and yielding to the shorter brunette’s pumping movements.
“Always… in… charge,” the long-haired woman whimpered, leaning over to grasp Elina’s shoulders in an effort to keep herself from losing balance.
In a swift move, the shorter woman retracted her fingers and hoisted the taller woman up over her shoulders, plopping her onto her back on the couch. The act left Vera somehow more speechless than before, though Elina left little opportunity for the tall woman to rest, diving her head down to replace what her fingers were doing with a tongue. She felt Vera’s body writhing and squirming, the struggle of finding release and losing it repeatedly washing over her.
“El,” Vera gasped, catching her breath to speak. “Can I please you…instead? I don’t know if I’d be able to… I’m not very good with…”
The short brunette popped her head up, concern etched on her brows.
“Are you absolutely sure?”
“Yes. I don’t have to be obligated to finish to please you, do I..?”
Elina mounted the rose gold cock, allowing Vera to watch as she lowered herself onto the thick toy.
“There’s no rule about it, and if you’re more comfortable with it, then I won’t complain,” Elina grunted, finally noticing the girth of the fantasy phallus stretch her from the inside. Her entrance throbbed around the knob of silicone that was just a little thicker than the rest of the dildo. She let herself pause and adjust to what she already had inside of her.
“Promise me that you’ll let me try to return the favour whenever you feel ready and comfortable though, Vera?”
“I promise.” The long-haired woman sat up to seal the promise with a quick kiss before she started to bounce Elina on her lap.
The feistier woman on top groaned aloud at the bulky cock, riding it with an enthusiastic hope that she’d be able to enjoy it more often with the person she fantasised about for the past two decades. Her body transitioned from the pain and aches of an unfamiliar width, to slickening it even more so as she neared the climax of her pleasure. She could feel Vera’s hips moving in rhythm with her, assisting in the impending orgasm. With renewed vigour and a spark of inspiration, Elina grabbed Vera’s braid and wrapped it around her own neck, tugging it tight as she choked herself with her partner’s long hair.
“That’s more like it,” Elina huffed smugly, much to Vera’s surprised expression. Feeling the rise of an orgasm, Elina leaned forward, suddenly delighted by the stimulation the new position gave her.
“I’m… so close…Vera!”
Vera clasped the shorter woman’s shoulders and pressed her partner’s body down; as Elina
climaxed, she felt the thick knob of the dildo thrust into her, revelling in the sharp pain circling the area of entry that transformed into a mind-numbing pleasure, all while her body contracted and pulsated around the fantasy cock.
“So you like them big?” quipped Vera, laying back onto the couch after unwrapping her hair from Elina’s neck. The petite woman took a few deep breaths to compose herself before answering.
“Oh yeah, I like those schlongs real big,” she retorted, half-joking. Elina rested her head on the hoodie still on Vera’s chest, her mind wandering back to the competition. “I can’t compete on your visuals, but I could have sworn I made those meringues perfect.”
“You needed to beat them a little more to get those stiff peaks,” Vera yawned, tucking an arm behind her head.
Elina popped up, eyes alight with fire.
“Take off your strap-on and I’ll show you stiff!”
“I’ll whip your butt next time! Mark my words, Vera Herney!”
“…In bed? Or in a competition?”
Quinn Rhodes (he/him) is a queer, trans, disabled sex writer with vaginismus. He’s a slut and a sex nerd who writes about his adventures in trying to fuck without fucking up. Quinn can usually be found wearing stomp-on-the-patriarchy boots while falling in love every time he fucks.