Category: Personal essays

  • Putting the Hot Octopuss PleX in my arse to get over my broken heart

    Putting the Hot Octopuss PleX in my arse to get over my broken heart

    When I start thinking about them, my chest gets tight and my eyes start smarting. It hurts, and I can’t get away from that pain yet. It’s too raw, too all-consuming. I try not to think about them, because thinking about them feels like someone’s ripping my heart out through my throat. You know when it’s hard to think about your broken heart? When you’ve stuck a massive chunk of silicone in your arse and are trying to work out if it feels good. (Spoiler: it does.) Enter the , a vibrating butt plug.

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  • Four ways I want to fuck Tony Stark

    Four ways I want to fuck Tony Stark

    Image sourced from MovieStillsDB.

    I want to fuck Tony Stark.

    The first time I can remember being turned on in public – or at least, what I imagine was arousal even though I didn’t understand what my body was doing at the time – was watching The Avengers in the cinema. It was 2014 and at fourteen I didn’t understand why I was so into the scene where Iron Man and Captain America faced off. I couldn’t explain why the tension between them in that moment was so hot. Now, however, I can articulate why two incredibly powerful (to say nothing of hot) men verbally sparring plays turns me on – and I also know I want to fuck Tony Stark.

    (Thank you to The Other Livvy for her brilliant writing about which MCU characters she’d like to fuck, and for encouraging me to write about the ways I want to fuck Tony Stark.)

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  • Am I a slut? Defining self-worth by fuckability

    Am I a slut? Defining self-worth by fuckability

    Am I a slut? In some ways the answer is easy. By my feminist, sex-positive reclamation of the word ‘slut’, I am one. I love sex. ‘Slut’ is a word I claim proudly, because there is power in owning my sexuality as a person with a vagina, who has always been told sex is not for me to enjoy. There’s also power in owning my sexuality as a queer man, because our cisheteronormative society is still scared of men who fuck men. But recently, I’ve begun to think about the pressure I feel to perform my sluttiness. I’ve begun to worry that I define my self-worth by my fuckability.

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  • Trans Joy: I wish we didn’t have to be so strong

    Trans Joy: I wish we didn’t have to be so strong

    This year, Smutathon are fundraising for two amazing charities who support trans and non-binary folks. We’re working with Gendered Intelligence in the UK and Trans Lifeline in the US. With less than twelve hours until I hop on a train down to London to join other members of the committee for some in-person smut writing, I want to talk about how much this year’s charities mean to me personally. I want to talk about how I wish trans people didn’t have to be so fucking strong.

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  • How not to make a podcast episode about feminist porn

    How not to make a podcast episode about feminist porn

    Image licensed through Adobe.

    The Guilty Feminist is an award-winning feminist comedy podcast hosted by Deborah Frances-White. It’s been downloaded over 70 million times, and it “explores our noble goals as 21st century feminists and the hypocrisies and insecurities that undermine them.” I listen most weeks and often enjoy the accessible feminism mixed with educational information on hard-hitting feminist causes. But after this week’s episode on feminist porn, I really wish that they would stop trying to talk about sex.

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