Coloured beads spell out 'lets talk sex'. Photo.

Valentine’s day is a Big Deal for sex writers and sex bloggers, but I traditionally celebrate a different significant day on 14th February. I know I still have a lot to learn – about myself and about sex – and I know half the things I want from sex and relationships right now will undoubtedly change, but I am proud of what I have learned about sex so far. So today I’m (consensually!) stealing an idea from my birthday twin, Kelvin Sparks, and sharing 21 things I learned about sex at 21.Read More →

Two women in bed together, being intimate and laughing together. Photo.

It sounds silly and utterly cliche to say that falling in love has taught me to love myself more, but it has. WhileI want to be a good person, a person worthy of dating them, they look at me as though I already am. Self-acceptance is something I have always struggled with, but I’m slowly beginning to rethink the ways I see myself. I’m learning a lot from my first relationship – including that being needy isn’t a bad thing.Read More →

A transmasculine gender non-conforming person and transfeminine non-binary person kissing

I’m dating someone. I’m in love in a way that I haven’t been before. It’s the kind of love in a way that makes me stronger, the kind of love that I wasn’t looking for when I unexpectedly stumbled into the arms of an incredibly attractive enby who actually likes me back. But in the less fun things that come with navigating my first romantic relationship, I also have to deal with the uncertainty: it’s not that I doubt that they love me – I know they do – but I do know they might not love me forever.Read More →

Red lipstick with condoms and birth control pills in pocket of jeans. Photo.

I’ve been thinking about writing this post for a long time, but didn’t want to share it until I could be sure that someone reading could potentially take something from my worst sex ever. It’s also important to note that I’ve published this with the knowledge and consent of the person I’m writing about in this post.Read More →

A woman lies back with her hand between her legs, knickers pushed to the side so she can touch her cunt. Photo.

My partner calls me a tease – a fair and accurate description given my investment in finding the words that will make them achingly hard and think about fucking me. But I remember, every time they say it with a fond grin or a playful groan, that for every person who affectionately calls me a tease, there’ll be another who’ll throw the words cock tease at me as an insult, or a justification.Read More →