Wedding night orgy: thinking up new, filthy traditions

Black woman in a wedding dress has her garter removed by a white masc person. Photo.
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As a solo poly slut in my early twenties, I’m pretty sure that I’m not going to get married. But as a queer, trans and polyamorous person, I’m pretty sure that if I do then it wouldn’t exactly be a traditional wedding – let alone a traditional marriage. And my favourite thing about writing your own relationship scripts is that it leaves a tonne of potential for thinking up new, filthy wedding traditions. Like the wedding night orgy.

Content note for pervy wedding night sex and exhibitionism. This post also includes affiliate links. 

There’s something deliciously perverted about the idea of a fairly traditional ceremony followed by a night of hot and hard fucking. Not completely traditional of course – ever since I realised I was queer, every time I picture my hypothetical wedding day I can only imagine myself in a fitted tux. Maybe whoever I’m marrying would be wearing a traditional white dress, but without any underwear underneath. Or maybe they would be wearing underwear, and they’d take it off to stuff it in my mouth so I stay quiet during our quick-and-filthy, mid-afternoon fuck.

Maybe I’d hide them in my pocket and sneak touches throughout the rest of the refined festivities, my dick twitching as I think about what comes next. Especially because my partner wouldn’t have let me come, not until the wedding night orgy itself. If other folks are hosting huge wedding night sex parties to finish off their wedding day with a (gang-)bang, those fuck sessions have not yet passed into marital ritual. This means that my partner and I will essentially get to make up the ways we’re going to fuck and get fucked by those close enough to us to not only be invited to the wedding but to the wedding night.

For example, as it isn’t yet a tradition for the newly weds to both get fucked by everyone in their respective partner’s wedding party, I think I would change that. I can imagine getting pushed to my knees, my tie used to tie my hands behind my back as I’m presented with cocks to suck and cunts to eat out. I can picture how my face would be dripping with wetness and saliva and pre-cum by the time they stepped back and I looked across the room at my new spouse, still on their knees and grinning widely and just as freshly face-fucked as me.

And that would just be the start.

Did you know that in Medieval England and France, the newlyweds would consummate their marriage directly after the ceremony in an adjoining room? Guests would even go into the wedding chamber and examine the bride’s stockings for signs that they had fucked – which is where tradition of tossing the garter comes from. For our filthy wedding night, I can imagine giggling and blushing as everyone watches me fuck my partner for the first time as a married couple. I’m not much of an exhibitionist, but there’s something deeply intimate – in a twisted way – about being watched as I kiss them, go down on them, and fuck them slowly and carefully.

I want to make them come again and again with my fingers and my mouth and my dick, and I want there to be witnesses to the love with which I fuck my new spouse. And when it’s their turn? I want my partner to whisper filthy words in my ear, forcing me to look up at the people watching as they make me whimper as I arch into their touch. I want them to pinch my thighs and tell me – cruelly, sadistically – to speak up so everyone can hear me beg for them to give me the orgasm that every atom of my body is craving.

The guests invited to our non-traditional wedding night would definitely bring non-traditional, orgy-appropriate wedding gifts. I can imagine my partner telling me to bend over and holding me down while two of our friends spread my butt cheeks and pushed a fancy new butt plug into my ass. They’d then kiss me and spin me around, holding my up while another friend got on his knees to suck my dick while his partner holds his head in place so they choke as I fuck his face.

I want to have so much sex on my wedding night that try as I might, I won’t be able to remember every filthy moment. I want my bridesfolk to pass my dick between them while I watch my new spouse getting mercilessly edged with the powerful vibrator they’ve just been given. I want to take off my jacket and roll my sleeves up so start off their wedding night spanking – another new tradition – knowing that it will be my go next and everyone gets to hit me once for every month my partner and I have been together. Tomorrow we’ll have matching bruises, and every time I sit down I’ll remember the people I love grinning and teasing me as they dish out the stingy pain that I love and hate in equal measure.

I can picture collapsing into my new spouse’s arms at the end of the night – sweaty and breathless and fucked out. We would kiss slowly and fall asleep on cool sheets while the sounds of our wedding night orgy are still going in the next room.

Maybe I should get married, just so I can start some of these filthy new traditions…

Are you preparing for a wedding night orgy? Or – more responsibly for the midst of a global pandemic – do you need to stock up for a marathon fuck session or lots of wanking from home? Whether you’re going to finger a bridesmaid or frig yourself cross-eyed to queer porn, you’re probably going to need lube for all your fucking adventures. Lots and lots of lube

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5 Comments

  1. I love this! The unsexy truth of my wedding night is that we were so exhausted we didn’t fuck lol not until the next morning. However I did fuck my boyfriend that same day and he was the best man, so not nearly as traditional as the whole event appeared!

  2. I loved reading this! Never even thought about a wedding orgy until this moment. Mmm the possibilities! 🙂



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